updatin

the theater thing continues. after the audition marathon the other day, when i had callbacks for both brooklyn boy at the jet and moonglow at the perf. network in ann arbor, i got cast in moonglow, replacing my dear friend shannon because she needed superbowl sunday off and they wouldn't get an understudy (so i heard). it has about a six week run, starting the first week in february. it's about dementia and nursing homes and swing dancing. i play "the girl" version of the protagonist, maxine, who has flashbacks to her days as a swing dancing gal. so i will be dancing a lot, which my grandmothers will like, but the rest of it might freak them out beyond sleep that evening or the evenings to follow.

in april i will spend three weeks at the boershead in lansing with this play. my my, what a commute.

christmas was busy as hell. is hell a busy place? busy as walmart. i had a party, my parents had three, the florkowski's had one, and rob had one. they were all nice and they were all a blur. i saw lots of good people all weekend, ate food that was just as good (though good in a different way) received some good ways to occupy my time as gifts, and ate lots of dessert. also good.

highlight of the week:
when i went to the gas station yesterday, i got a special discount from the guy behind the counter because he thought i was his middle-eastern cousin! and the name nora strikes again!

One more note: if you are in ann arbor, let me know! i need places to crash, esp. on saturday nights because i have to do sunday matinees.

discovery

my parents are in ny visiting jeff wilkinson and i am raiding their computer and their fridge and i found, from one of the christmas parties, someone left toffee/chocolate brittle in the freezer!

and some people think there's no God...

Tom Waits on Poetry

"Poetry is a dangerous word. It's very misused. Most people when they hear the word "Poetry" think of being chained to a school desk, memorizing "Ode to the Grecian Urn." When someone tells me they're going to read me a poem, I can think of any number of things I'd rather be doing. I don't like the stigma that comes from being called a poet--So I call what I'm doing an improvisational adventure or an inebriational travelogue, and all the sudden it takes on a while new form and meaning.

If I'm tied down to call myself something, I prefer "storyteller." Everyone has their own definition of what poetry is, and of who's a poet. I think Charles Bukowski is a poet--and I think most will agree to that."

Radio Heaven

On the way home from the Audition-Marathon, This Over the Rhine quote slapped me pretty hard.

i guess i never told you
'bout this life i'm livin'
it's heaven versus hell
in a split decision
this secret religion is
the best that i've found
i radio heaven
when no one's around
~I Radio Heaven

Thinking about Poetry

Okay, so I've been using a supposed Auden quote for nearly half a decade now... I shared it with Rob who, in a little less toned-down way, said Auden's philosophy was "self indulgent" (ha ha ha, Robby Z!). So, I'm going to retell the story that my poetry professor told me about the fellow and then discuss it.

I've often quoted the poet man as saying that poetry is playing with words. That is a rough summery of this story:

When Auden was teaching at some university (he taught at several including that big Blue one), a student showed up in his office and said, "I want to write poetry."
To which Auden replied, "How come?" and the student said,
"Because I have something to say."
And Auden said, "Then go ahead and say it."
Another student comes into his office and said the same thing. "I want to be a poet.
Auden says, "How come?"
The student says: "I like to play with words."
And Auden says, "Sit down."

Or maybe it was told to me that the student said, "I like words."


So, that's the idea that was put in my head by my poetry-as-lit-professor, Professor Powers while I was simultaneously taking my first poetry/fiction CW class. I liked this idea a lot--that poetry was separate from other writing forms because the author pays more attention to the words, their form, the way they sound--and not just the idea he's trying to convey.

(I don't think this story actually happened. It may have, but has the structure of a joke. I just enjoy the idea)

Rob's argument was that all writing is supposed to communicate, if not, it's masturbating. I agree with him on this--but i think both ideas are correct. I think Auden's poetry is a fine sample of wordplay and profound communication of ideas. I guess what I want to be, as a poet, is someone who can communicate and play at the same time. I think Shakespeare is one of the best at this, that I know anyway, at choosing words that convey ideas in their meaning and their sound. For example, in the Henry V prologue:

"Can this Cockpit hold the vasty fields of France?"
(meaning, can this theater hold the french fields we're trying to portray. Look guys! A reference to cockfighting! Where's the Cadieux?)

Can-This-Cockpit is abrupt sounding, limited sounding, if you will. And "Vasty Feilds of France" sounds huge--especially if you're trying to say it out loud, and the rhythm slows down.

So do you get what I'm saying? Anyway, I love discussing this stuff, and as many of you are poets, I'd like to know your thoughts.

seeing a lot and spending too much money

I apologize in advance for the typos. i've been making them like crazy today.

Hi folks. I have more movie reviews, but I'm going to give you my life in chronological order:

Friday, Dec 2nd: Over the Rhine at the Ark.
Lovely concert. Accompanied by Joel, Hawk, and what Joel calls my "Army of Blondes": Meg, Lisa, Bethany Patterson, Bose (Bethany Goad). Though the music was wonderful, my favorite part was when Karin referred to Linford as her, "Bohwa" (Boy). I liked "Little Did I Know" the best out of all of the songs they performed. It's very impressive to me, how a couple of people from 2005 can write a song that sounds like 1935. I guess I liked the concert so much that I jumped at the opportunity to see them again, on the 18th, in Lisa and my Roadtrip Reprise down to Ohio to see them forst in Cincinatti and then go up to Clevelend to check out the R&R Hall of Fame because they are showing an exhibit about Tommy: The Amazing Journey. I hope OTR performs Blue and Jesus in New Orleans there. And what's that other one: Who will guard the door when I am sleeping. I love that song and wanted to hear it.

After the concert, Hawk, Joel, Meg, Bose and I went over to the Hiedleberg (someone help me with the spelling)and enjoyed the German downstairs. The bartender was cool, but not as cool as listening to Bose order in German!

SATURDAY, Dec 3rd: Saw Nickel and Dimed. Why did someone turn a book of essays into a play? As a result, the play had no climax, no structure. But the actors did a nice job and it looked good.

SUNDAY, Dec 4th: Saw Handel's Messiah at the DSO. That was a fine experience. It was fun to dress up with Joel. The singers, the leads, were amazing. And MSU's choir did a fine job as well. After that show I got a fantastic squash-paste pasta dish at the Traffic Jam. YUM.

TUESDAY, Dec 6th: Saw a wings game for free! God bless Joel's hook-ups. Shanahan scored twice, Yzerman scored once. Had a nice time, despite the fact that my friends got yelled at by some fans sitting in front of us for being rowdy during a hockey game!!

WEDNESDAY: Started guitar lessons with Thornetta Davis' guitar player, Brett Lucas. It went well, but it's a lot of work to practice every day. I think it will be good for me. It's just hard to imagine keeping it up, once I get a busy schedule.

THURSDAY: Went to Uncle Tom's Bible Study after auditioning for the JET porduction of Brooklyn Boy. Saw a lot of old favorites there. I had a good time at the audition, though the part isn't really right for me. I mean, I hope it's not, since it's a valley girl. The Bible Study was nice. We're studying Corinthians. I'd just heard Dale teach this, not too long ago, so his stuff was still fresh. But man, are those teachers different,

FRIDAY: What did I do on Friday? Oh, I babysat and then met Joel and Annie at a bar in corktown called the Lager House. I was so beat that I can't remember the band very much. What was their name, Annie? Something and the Holy Ghost Church? I liked their sound. The girl was supposed to have a violin but it got stole. OH! That's what the song that Kelly from Destiny's Child sings: Life is Stole (oh oh, now we'll never know... Benny was in that video.) Sorry! Like I said, I was beat...

YESTERDAY: I went to my Grandma's B-day dinner at Paesanos in Ann Arbor, then I went home and watched three movies back to back (one in the theater)

DIRTY PRETTY THINGS: I enjoyed this, disturbing as it was. It had good characters and a clever twist. But it was a hard one. So sad!

HOTEL RWANDA: Saw it before but wanted to show it to Joel. It made Dirty Pretty Things seem like a Disney Flick.

THE CHRONICALS OF NARNIA: A disney flick! I tried not to be too critical. It was nice to look at but I like my imagination better. The kids looked good. Do you think it's a coincidence that Peter looks just like Prince William? My favorite part was when Aslan walked across the beach below Cair Paravel, right after he was resurrected, and I said aloud, "Footprints!"

And the winner is... Hotel Rwanda. Life is a competition.

Mooovies.

well, with thanksgiving out of the way, we're on our way to christmas now. I wouldn't know, i'm not in retail or anything... i had a lovely holiday week. let me tell you about it.

on sunday i went to see savion glover tap dance to classical musica and it was fantastic. he's amazing, there ain't anything else to say about him. oh, and i saw otis there, which was a real treat for me. i gotta get some more tap lessons quick! though watching savion makes me never want to ATTEMPT to tap dance again...

i rented a whole load of movies. let me tell you about all the movies i've seen lately:

1) The Virgin Suicides. Already told you about it.

2) Harold and Maude. I saw this for the first time. What a trip! A trip up the old staircase, as I used to say. I agree with lisa, that the best one is when he takes out that meat cleaver and chops off his hand. if you don't know what i'm talking about, rent it yourself!

3) Closer. This movie just made me mad. Good performances, but trashy writing! Do people actually ever talk like that? Eww. Gross. Come on people... Where's the love, black eyed peas?

4) A Very Long Engagement. Description: Amelie with more sex and waaaay more blood. It was heart wrenching but i really like that director's style. There's something beautiful and quirky about his movies with all those adorable anecdotes (which, in this movie, included horrific ways of killing people in WWI. Yuck!) Maybe it's just that he's French? I wouldn't mind looking exactly like Audrey Tatou. I've tried her hair a couple times. It suits me. She was great. The movie had a disappointing ending though, i thought. Not that I know of a better way to end it. But can you beat Amelie's ending?

IN the theater: Walk the Line. I enjoyed this one. I didn't think it was dull (as did my brother). I thought reese was fantastic and the singing was cool. In hindsight, would have liked to see a bit more about Jesus. But it was about June and Johnny, that was the plot, not really his conversion, I'd say. It was a tight film to me, and Dan Miller from Blanche was cool to see on screen.

Okay, enough with the movies. Friday night was fun. Had a big crowd (the faces i saw that night were: ian my bro, lisa, rebecca r, rachel my cousin, and then briefly marty. also saw uncle matthew) at the bar after seeing two shows. The first was ACTION at the Abreact. It was nice to see Rollo Rollin rollin' around the stage in a big old chair, and Mr. Maher gut a fish. YUM. And the next was a drama developed through improv down at the ANT late-night. Got to see my friend Katie Thomas on stage. She was in my acting class at UM. I half expected John Neville Andrews to stop the performance with a "hold please!" and then give some anecdote of his own about some whore somewhere. And then hear Kevin Bradley Jr. giggle. Is anyone getting any of this? my point was to say i felt like i was in my acting class again because we had to watch each other act so gosh darn much. I enjoyed her performance though.

After that we all went to the "O Brothers" and danced around to Dan Kahn on the juke box.

On Sunday I bought a new battery for that van. i'd call it cursed, but that would be rude. Looks like I'll be driving it for a while, anyway. And that's it folks. That's what I have been up to. This week is packed with activities... i'll tell you about them after they occur.

Oh for the record, musie knows about joel now. so i guess everyone else will, soon. her reaction: "How old is he again?"

bringing in the snacks

Well, Inherit the Wind is so over. I'm glad, though I did have a good time with my foursome--Alec, Ian, Carly and I--who spent the last week writing the afterglow skit. Many hours in my living room. We kept my roomate up too much, I feel bad about that, but the skit was a success. (The afterglow is when the stagehands put on a show to spoof the original.) The theme was about bringing in snacks at rehearsal, since the Park Players have made issues out of that. You have to sign up, etc. And you get in big trouble if you bring in snacks and don't clean up.

I would tell you highlights, but as you can imagine, it's mostly inside jokes for the cast. We did quote one of the finest directorial spewings ever noted by a director in community theater history:

"No guys! It's supposed to be more like sex! More like Sex! The best sex you ever had... except for you kids, for you it's like Christmas."

Also, we had a little girl selling "Hot dogs! lemonade! eskimo pie! birth control!" which was appalling and shamefully hilarious. I shake my head and crack up everytime i think of it.

The actual show ended up being s success critic-wise, i think. I had a darn good time but will not miss saying some of those lines: "A thought is like a child, it has to come out!"

Backstage I read "The Virgin Suicides" by Jeffery Eugenides during my 20 min break during act two (except for those times i chatted away with lisa instead). It was great. I saw the movie last night which I enjoyed as well. But the book was better, of course. It was, I interpretted it as, a commentary on life in Grosse Pte. during the Detroit riot years. It was beautifully written. In the movie, Kirsten Dunst played a real slut. Who knew she could be such a slut?

--Slut is such an ugly word, isn't it?

Also to note, I went to Cleveland last week to tour with I WAS JUST KIDDING. It was uneventful. except one of the schools had a book mobile. It reminded me of when I played Popeye Jackson and had a monologue about a traveling book mobile. There were also little books for the Narnia Movie coming out. It looks like it's going to be pretty and add a lot of unnecessary stuff. Mr. Joel will probably drag me to see it. But I won't say I won't be kicking! At the same time, I get annoyed when people don't like the LOTR movies, because as movies they are great. As books they are better but if the books were taken verbatim and thrown on screen, they would make terrible movies. So, I KNOW they are different avenues of creative expression, but I kind of like the way the characters look in my own head....

Anything else? Happy Thanksgiving, I guess, considering the fact that I probably won't update before then.

Inherit the Wind thoughts

I just got home from Troy, where I accompanied Mary Davis to do an "I was Just Kidding" show for some people/kids in a Jewish Congregation. After the show, which went fine though the audience was too quiet for the play to really work, Mary and I talked about the message in our show, what we were trying to convey to the kids. That was interesting, but not as interesting as the conversation that followed my beckoning to change the subject to Inherit the Wind, as I have the Sunday matinee to execute in two hours and ten minutes from now...

I asked that we talk about Inherit the Wind so I could get my mind on it. We talked about my character, Rachel, for a bit--how she's at a turning point in her life where she realizes that it's okay to ask questions and she questions some of the things that had been instilled in her by her (psycho, he's actually psycho) Christian Fundamentalist father, the town reverend. That's how Mary got to talking about the spiritual themes of our play. (Mary is the producer, btw).

She brought up a line that comes from the agnostic defense attorney, Drummond, about the religious figure/prosecuting attorney, Brady. Drummond criticizes Brady for believing in a God "Too high up and too far away." After Mary repeated this line, my brain started ticking. Drummond, at the last scene, reveals in this line that he's more spiritual than we are led to believe. I love the fact that he says this line, because I think it's really one of the major themes of the play. It's a theme in my spiritual life, anyhow:

Why do we have a tendency to shove God back into that special room of the temple, where only the highest priest can interract with Him, when, through Jesus, God has made himself accessable to us? Dale Batten always brings up what a wonderful thing it is to know that now WE are the temple of God, that God created us to hold his very spirit; that no longer do we have to prepare ourselves, outwardly, to enter the Holy of Holys, (Holies? haha) to interract with our God. Jesus came to us, died for us, and now lives in us... some of us believe this, so why do we have a tendency to try and send Jesus back to his room while we wait outside and try to make ourselves worthy of Him? His resurrection has made us worthy of God, worthy enough to have God reside in us.

Which brings us back to Inherit the Wind. At one point, Drummond asks Brady where Cain's wife came from, and Brady says "I don't think about the things I don't think about." Here, Drummond drills Brady because he wants him to think about the things he believes. I get this Brady answer sometimes, from some people. "He's God," is their answer to my questions, "He can do whatever He wants." But do we not believe that God wants to think about the things that He does? It seems that our faith would call us to question, because, in faith, we believe that God has the right answer. To me, my relationship with Jesus always goes back to the fact that Jesus is real, He's alive, he has a personality (He's a person) for me to get to know, and he wants to have Fellowship with me. He wants me to communicate with Him. A huge part of communicating, of most deep conversations, is asking questions. I want to know Jesus more so I ask Him questions.

I think bad communication with God is when we ask Him questions and wait for Him to give us the answers we already know (I do this constantly...) First of all, that's not having faith that God is a very interesting Being, and second of all, it's not having faith in the sovereignity of God. If I could only keep in mind, when I ask my questions, that God is the Lord, the Creator, and He's sovereign, then I might find clearer answers to these things that frustrate me about my faith. If I could only figure out how to trust God for His answers when I ask my questions...

So, I guess that's why I think Inherit the Wind is a good play. It does not try to answer the question of how we came about (or, it shouldn't, anyway), but urges people to think things through. And as a Faith-based person, I should not be offended by Inherit the Wind's recommendation that we take advantage of our right to think, but be grateful for it. Because, through Jesus, I have been granted a right to ask God questions and to trust His answers.

And I had to skip church today to do the I Was Just Kidding Show...

goings on

So, we open Inherit the Wind tomorrow. There's enough people in it to have a big time musical number. It was looking good at yesterday's rehearsal. Meanwhile, I have been on the "committee" of people my age in the cast who are all writing the afterglow skit that makes fun of the production. This is a frightfully easy task.

I had election day off from rehearsal, even though we're in the middle of tech week, and saw Mr. Jeff Tweedy of Wilco-fame pour his soul out into an acoustic guitar. It was cool! Souls are neat-looking... Okay whatever. I didn't get a lot of sleep last night. Jeff was great. I think he played mostly stuff from Being There. He played tha "Turn your eyes to the Lord of the Skies" Woody-Guthrie-Aeroplane-song. Beautiful song. The drummer from Wilco opened for him and he was great. As my bro predicted, Jeff talked alot to us. He was a little quiet at first and then got rolling. He just seems like a nice guy. Someone yelled at him "You're fucking beautiful, man!" to which Tweedy replied something along the lines of "I always have strived to be fucking beautiful." What did he say? I think he was funnier than that... Oh well. I want to see that documentary now.

I have done another round of kid shows this week. Oh, I didn't mention that yet. I got pulled into a touring JET show called "I was Just Kidding." It's, as co-actor Eli called it, a "Morality Play" about some kids that learn to play nice instead of backstabbing each other and talking about each other. It's fun but I have had to miss church twice for it, miss some of my babysitting opportunities, etc. But I don't mind too much. We have a talk-back after with the kids, but they just aren't fun without Joel.

On Tuesday night I went to bed to see who the Mayor was. It was Freman Hendricks. When I woke up, it was Kwame A. River. Do they have these problems in Canada? They must, because Margaret Atwood is about the angriest author I know of.

Lisa had someone comment on her blog under the name of "It's 1am and I can't think but I'm commenting anyway". How random is that? And then they lectured her! I almost peed my pants. Come on now, if you are going to give your sermon, show yourself! Haha. I wonder if that person, it's definitely a gal, reads my blog.

So today we went on tour with the kids show to Holly, Michigan. And guess what folks, there were black kids there! I was pleased and delightfully surprised. Next week we're going to Cleveland. I hope to see the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, not that the visit would bring me any closer to Bono than I've already been. Now I'm wondering if the anon. commenter was a gal... I should stop talking about that.

I had a dream the other day that I was in Hazel's house in Kwazulu Natal and I stepped outside and Arifani was there (one of my best South Africans) and he gave me a big hug and told me I he wasn't going to let me go back to America. I woke up just then! That was so heart-wrenching.

I feel pretty shameless in this blog entry. Lets see, I sweared, I mean, swore, I ripped on someone's comment, I said "peed my pants." You may blame it on the Theater whilst I sigh.

No Failure Here, Sweetheart

Hello again. I'm finally caught up on sleep from the three day trip to see U2 in Auburn Hills. No, it didn't really take 3 days, just 26 hours because I went with Ian and Marty, aka, Diehard U2 Fans. We were also joined by two of Marty's sisters, Connie and Angela. So it was a family affair. We slept in the parking lot of the Post Bar across the street (Opdyke?). I once went to the Post with Nate and Xander to see a band play. Around this time of year, I think. Anyway, the Marty/Ian clan couldn't sleep in the parkinglot of the Palace because the security there was pretty stiff. We drove around for about 4 hours looking for U2 fans and then finally found them at about 1am. There was one girl organizing the line. We gave her several names, including, our ring leader, "Good Stuff", Numero Uno, One, etc. She was even more diehard because she saw the vertigo tour about seven times or something and last time she was pulled up on stage with Bono, so that somehow gave her seniority. Good Stuff. (we gave her that name because Marty said something to her, and that was her response.)

Angela has a son and couldn't find a babysitter (her mom stood her up or something) so she kept going back and forth to Novi, once she appeared with her child, and then finally she went and picked up the youngest Shea sister from school to babysit. It was crazy but kind of amusing. Marty did not stop scheming the whole time. He came up with about seventy five master plans for this and that. I can't remember any of these.

Well, we had about 70 or so people in the parkinglot when we all ventured over to the Palace around 2pm. There were 15 people already standing in line to get in, so Good Stuff ended up being more like 16 instead of one. We couldn't get those in front of us to join our numbering system because the Palace announced on the radio that the numbering starts at the door or something. But the rest of us kept our number system.

When we finally got in the place, all five of us won the lottery to stand in teh "elipse" of the Vertigo stage, which meant that we were five of the 300 that could stand nearest to the main stage. Ian, Marty, Connie, and I stood so we leaned on the stage. We were close enough for Bono to spit on us. Whether he did or not, I can't remember.

Gavin Rossdale's new band opened. They are called Institution. He is a good-lookin' man. Had no idea.

My favorite part of the concert was when I heard Bono sing,

There's no failure here sweetheart,
Only when you quit."

That sounded like the Kingdom of God to me. It blew me away because I've been dipping in doubts lately. The line took me by surprise. I have listened to the new album alot, but those are lyrics from the Miracle Drug song and I don't really like it very much; I usually skip it. But I did like it live. Other highlights were Where the Streets Have No Name, with bright heaven lights. I also enjoyed that he closed with Forty. And he played Walk On, which, those who know me know that that song is pretty significant to me. The disappointing thing to me was that he didn't play Original of the Species. Which would have been fun because, A) I'm in Inherit the Wind so I would have enjoyed the Darwiny reference, and B) because that song would have been good live. My favorite U2 song right now is "One Step Closer" off of the new album. It is so simple but it rips me up every time. I guess my favorite U2 songs, One Step Closer, When You Look at the World, Playboy Mansion, these are all Album songs, rather than show songs.

Well, that's it about U2 for now. Looking forward to seeing them on their next tour.

Next time: I need to update you all on how my Grandma and I both got Mugged at gunpoint when I took her to the doctor. Maybe I Can just tell you right now. I was stupid and talking to my dad on the cellphone while I climbed in the car, and when I looked up to close the door (after I hung up the phone) there was a gun in my face. I had about 10 dollars in my pocket from babysitting earlier that day. I gave him that. My grandma didn't know he had a gun and was yelling at him.SHe siad "We just came from the doctor! How do you expect us to have money on us?" I started to close the door on him and he went away. the spookiest part was that he was about 15 or 16 years old.. Later on, I talked to my grandma about it and she said she wished she hadn't yelled at him. I told her, "No Grandma, that's the best part of the story," and she laughed. I feel pretty bad-ass because people move out of the city for things like that. I'm not going anywhere. Yet.

a small dabble to keep the blog moving

I just realized that it's been weeks since I added to this thing. Part of this is due to the fact that I don't get to the internet much anymore. The JET show is done and now I spend most of my time in rehearal for Inherit the Wind or The Wizard of Oz at the Ant.

I sang last night at a benefit concert for the Convenant Community Care, which is a health center that treats people without insurance. I sang back up for Chris Martin's band--my uncle Paul and Aunt Donna and Frank Oakley. It was a good time. It made me want to get back into my own music, which I'm a little annoyed that I don't have much time for.

I seem to be seeing a lot of music lately. I don't know how I have time for it. I saw Blanche at the Magic Stick a couple weeks ago. Tomorrow night I'll have had the U2 experience. On the 8th I'm going to see Jeff Tweedy (of Wilco) in Ann Arbor. And on the 2nd I'll get to see Over the Rhine at the Ark in Ann Arbor.

I have 6 mins before I have to get to rehearsal. I have stories to tell, I guess they will have to wait.

Stolen Clip, Update

I got this from my cousin Rachel's site. It made me laugh.

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/shining.html

I'm sitting at the JET, "putzing around"* the internet. I don't have a car yet, but, fingers crossed, I'll have one tomorrow morning. Meanwhile, I've been pretty successful at borrowing a car when I need one, mostly from my mother. The only thing is, her car is the same color as the asphalt, so I get a little nervous driving it.

Other than that, I started sitting for the Garretts again, now on Wednesdays. I had to cart the four kids all over town. The highlight was a game of Mad-Libs on the way to dropping Elizabeth off at Mosaic (W Grand Blvd and 3rd, around) that even John, who is three, participated in. The best part was when Tommy Garrett had to name a liquid and chose "Poison." That worked very well, as you can imagine, especially when the entry was about a kitchen inspection.

On Monday I taught the three year old girl I sat for how to play Monopoly. We didn't get very far into the game, but she got the idea. She must have been so bored.

Rehearsals for Inherit the Wind have gotten to be kind of stressful. The part I have, Rachel, flips out in just about all her scenes. It takes a lot of emotional investing, and that seems to be harder for me to do ever since I dropped being depressed, say seven months ago. I'll take being stable, thank you.

Oh, and I'm hoping to go see Jeff Tweedy play a solo concert in Ann Arbor sometime soon... does anyone remember when that is? I need to make sure I have it off.

*I stole this phrase from Lisa, but it seems more appropirate since I am around more Jews than she is. BTW, I wonder if she knows what that word means... Uncle Matthew just explained.

Hurray for Hawk

Joel's friend John Hawkinson (Okay, he's my friend too) got us tickets to see the White Stripes o Sunday night. We went to the Masonic Temple, which reminded me of my rebel days sneaking around that haunted place (if I wake up dead tomorrow, you'll know it's because a mason reads this blog). The duo was fantastic. I really want the new album now. I was so ignorant about them--I thought that there was more people in the band! That's because all I knew about them were a) what I heard off an album I stole from Nate for a couple of months and b) the three disk on a tape compilation my brother left in my house that I listened to driving around last summer, c) that jack white used to date renee z. and d) he just got married to a super model and e) he kissed my Aunt Faith when she was five. I didn't know he could get all that sound out of one guitar.

Hawk claimed to know Marty and Ian. So did this accompaniment--Julie somethingorother who recognized me from my old talent agency. Weird!

Dylan

My mom wrote a poem after watching the Scorsese (sp?) Dylan Doc on PBS. She wrote this at 2am:


About Bobbie D

He is a character

has character

and the content of his character

is content to be

What it is

I said

What it is

JET-Play Boredom (again, skip if you like)

I stole this from Palmer's online journal. Time filler I decided to publish (because it's much more fun to fill out with an imagined audience)


THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Nora Jean
2. Nojay
3. Sho'ty

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. NJtheLB
2. Uyulala14
3. Chicken3 (Freenet! Remember Freenet?)

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. the little scar by my right eye
2. hair
3. eyelashes

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. sinuses
2. hearing loss
3. wish my hands were a little bigger (so i could play the guitar easier)

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. English
2. Irish
3. Welsh

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. driving
2. my next door neighbor
3. "the duldrums of a once-place destiny"

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. laughing
2. reading (or writing)
3. playing the guitar

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. contact lenses
2. earrings
3. hiking boots

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS:
1. America (P. Simon)
2. Think About Your Troubles (H. Nilsson)
3. Mama You've Been On My Mind (Bob Dylan)

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. a sense of humor
2. faithfulness
3. surprises

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE (in no particular order, try and guess which is which):
1. Chaleshisdick means nauseating or sickening in Yiddish
2. Farblondget means lost or dysfuctional in Yiddish
3. Farputst means perplexed in Yiddish

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. wit
2. honesty
3. not materialistic

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Learn how to play the guitar really well
2. Write a steller story to send to MFA programs
3. buy a car

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING/YOU'VE CONSIDERED:
1. Undergraduate Writing Instructor/Writer
2. Urban Planner
3. Egyptologist

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Buenos Aires
2. Greece
3. Prince Edward Island in the Autumn

THREE KID'S NAMES YOU LIKE:
1. Ella
2. Eva
3. Henry

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Learn Spanish
2. See a Wilco concert
3. Live somewhere else

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
1. I use my cute to get what I want
2. I blushed when I was putting away baby shoes at JCP
3. I wear make-up

THREE CELEB CRUSHES:
1. Edward Norton
2. Savion Glover
3. Toby McGuire

THREE PEOPLE THAT I WOULD LIKE TO SEE TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW:
1. Jesus (I'm curious about what parts of his body he doesn't like. Besides, I'd bet he'd have really interesting, faith stretching, mind-boggling, rebel answers)
2. Tom Waits
3. Joe Colosi's Parents

A Eulogy

Stanley Kowalski is dead.
I'm referring to my 95 Taurus that was,like the Streetcar character, big, hot, and had a lot of problems. Now he has too many problems.

His death came about from the leaky transmission fluid that streaked the streets--not dripping, but pouring out like a faucet. I took him to the transmission place who told that he was beyond repair for his worth.

Anyone need to get rid of a well-running car?

Some more poems

I've been having a blast with the poetry forms book I stole form my mom. There was one entry about Alphabet poems. It told the writer to write a poem based on how a letter looks to us. We use ee cummings as a model:

e.e.’s:
who are you, little i

(five or six years old)
peering from some high

window at the gold
of november sunset

and feeling: that if day
has to become night

this is a beautiful way



I was amused with what I came up with (no where as lovely as ee's):

Who are you, little c?
Pac-man, I think
Chomping fruits and speeding up
Around the corners of your maze
You search for these,
For bananas and cherries
And oranges: more points for
A higher score.

When you’ve chomped a screen-full
You may move on, but careful
The higher the level
The more frequent are your ghosts.

Nora's 201st post

Reporting from the JET.

Act one of Broadway Bound is longer than the whole Two Men in a Box.

Well, half of my week is over. Highlight of the last week at JC Penney:

Nora: That rack of St. John's Bay shirts is pretty empty. Should I try to grab some from the stockroom?
New Supervisor: I think there may be some in the stockroom.
Nora: Yeah, that's what I'm asking.
New Supervisor: Do you know how to go upstairs to the stockroom?

No. I haven't a clue. Good thing I'll be out of there before they can teach me!

Highlight of Monday's Babysitting:
(N.grills cheese sandwiches and puts them on plates for E. and O.)
O. I want dip for my sandwich!
N. What dip? Ranch?
O. (Shouting) No! The red one!
E. (Also shouting) Yeah! Weh Wa!
N. Ketchup?
E. and O. (Shouting) Yeah!
(Nora squirts Ketchup on O.'s plate)
O. More!
E. Moe!
(Nora fills the plates)
E. (Screaming) Moe!
N. You don't need more.
E. (Screaming louder) Moe wahh Wehhhh!
N. What?
E. (Screaming and crying) Wehhhhh moe!!!
N. You don't need more.
(Nora puts Ketchup in fridge. Meanwhile, E. plays with the ketchup on her plate with her bare hands and then hops off her high-chair.)
N. No! Stand still! Don't touch anything!
(E. runs to dining room curtains. Nora turns around and sees tiny, gooey red hands clutching the curtains from behind.)

Also this week I taught Hannan House Yesterday which is always a joy. We read a play about how Nero, Ivan the Terrible, and Satan form a plot to destroy Christmas from their hellish domain. Of course, we won't be performing that one but BOY was it an experience to listen to. It was all in rhyme.

Finally, I had the read through for Inherit the Wind at the Park. The cast, I believe, is very good, esp. those who were cast as Drummond (Kirk Kreckler) and Harrison (I think his name is?) (Some guy named Frank is the actor.) The guy playing my opposite is named Ian and is a film and video major at EMU. I asked him if he were my brother. He said no. He's not my brother--this Ian is over six feet tall. I made the statement that after the trial is over, we run off to become an Ice Skating team.

That's all folks. Two more days of JCP. Three and and a half more weeks at JCC (That's the Jewish Ensemble Theater hang out.)

I should also mention that here at the JCC, someone had a beach party
bar mitvah and filled the welcome hall with blow-up palmtrees. I didn't even get to see the hall where they had the actual bar mitzvah. At the end of the party, the people who threw the bash threw out all the trees to the loading dock. Annie and I salvaged our own.

one of those rants about being busy, skip if you like.

Well, I did it again. Got myself into a show. Or two, if your count the backstage area. I told myself I would take a break from theater. Meanwhile I start rehearsals for the neighborhood's Inherit the Wind on Tuesday, and I'm right smack in the middle of tech week for the JET show. They're running act II right now. I wish Palmer were here. Good news is, there's not much food in this show. Less dishes to wash. I wish I were doing props for Oleanna.

I'm busy enough to be in school again. I have JCP (last week) every morning next week at 6am. 3 days of babysitting, prep and class time for Hannan House. Meeting with a writer's group somewhere in there. Too much to do when I'm going to bed at 12am and waking up at 5. It's only Sunday night, not even the start of the work week and I want to collapse. But hopefully after this week I will be very very rich. For some reason, I'm doubtful of that.

Just this week is bad. Here is my schedule past that (you know, just in case you want to hang or something...)

Mondays: babysitting 11-5
Tuesdays: Hannan House, 12:30-2, I'll probably go there at 11 to prep, make copies, etc. Rehearsal at night
Wednesdays: Sitting for the Garrett's in the afternoon, JET or Park Players at night.
Thursdays: Writer's group in Ann Arbor at 4:15pm, JET show at night
Fridays.: babysitting 11-5, No JET show, Sun went down on the sabbath
Saturdays: 2 JET shows, 5pm and 8:30pm. So much for the sabbath. I guess the sun will go down around 6pm after daylight savings.
Sundays: Church and JET show or Players Rehearsal.

Oh my... will that actually be my life?

Keeping on the happy side, the gas prices have been falling...

Memory Lane

I found a CD Lisa's dad made me as they were clearning out an old computer. I want another Big Doings! Or how about our own?

Poems about the Apocalypse

I've been writing some poetry as a warm up when I work on my fiction. My mother has a book of poetry forms and I'm working my way through it.

ABSTRACT: When the sound of the words and lines of the poem take precidence over their meaning. I found that my poem did have meaning--probably influenced by the fact that I've been reading Ezekiel. I call it:

WRATH
Green slugs in the gray mud sing the
Murky thumps of rhinoceros stomps and
Breathe the geekish friends of freaks in chalked-up streaks.
We climb the drums and twiddling tombs. And daylight:
Mighty heads hear the fearful hell-bound snow clowns
Scream their tunes in flutes and sticks beating,
Dripping the jet stream waves and waking in ready tears
To trumpets jumping shrieks and painting cheeks in peaches. Teach
The drooping child to jump. Dance the doom steps home in
Synchronization: acclamations heard in foreign lyrics, spears
And swords swipe the screams in two. The notes bounce, pouncing
As puppies on careful stones. The end will not come. The end
Has already begun.

The other is a double-sided ACROSTIC:

reality isn’t always pretty is it
ever enough to sing your aria
to ease my troubles make me ask
unanswerables and this ache
runs my show and plays the guru
now standing in this looking-glass
tries to teach me to trust this ash
out from hellfire they’ll burst to
unimagined heights no sum
sustained in this darkness come

DISCOVERY: I like words with "hell" in them, Hell-fire, Hell-bound...

What's Up (and Going)

1) I resigned from JC Penney's last Friday. A week and a half to go. Good thing too because it's September and there's Christmas stuff out on the sales floor!

2) Picked up some regular baby-sitting jobs. One for the Vitales (Hannah-6, Olivia-3.5, and Ella-2)in South Lyon on Mondays and Fridays and the other for John Garrett (3)on Wednesdays that will start up when his father finds work.

3) Will start next weekend backstage doing props for the JET's production of Broadway Bound. I'm looking forward to being able to see Annie Palmer more often. I know she's still alive because I read her blog. She's playing a concert in Ann Arbor Sunday night. Can't wait to see it. I hope the JET won't conflict.

4)I started teaching at the Hannan House (Senior Activities Center). I'll be teaching a Reader's Theater class. Today I had three people, all of whom I knew before, from the class I helped Blair out with last winter and spring. We'll be performing a play around Christmas time.

5) I've been house sitting for my parents who are on a train right now, heading through Colorado, home from the Grand Canyon. They said the Canyon was spectacular. They're right; I've seen it.

6) Been writing more songs. Right now I have 10 I wrote myself. Looking to do more performing, though my voice isn't quite back yet. Maybe a week from Sunday I'll do an open mic. Anyone interested in coming, or performing with me?

7) My parents "put the dog down" before they left. She was old, pretty dysfunctional, and condemned to our basement. I'm glad I hadn't lived here to be a part of THAT. She's buried in our backyard. I still feel like she's in the family room when I come in from the back door. I'm feeling pretty emotionally disconnected from it, so no need for sympathy. I wonder if I'll ever own a dog again. Maybe if someday I find myself feeling extra responsible, buckled down, with a routine schedule, home often, and bored. Who knows when that will be... Not any time soon.

That's all for now...

some fun for you

Check this out.

ghost for sale

Currently Reading

I started THE GREATER TRUMPS yesterday. A Charles Williams book. Williams was one of the inklings, along with Tolkien and Uncle Clive and Dorothy Sayers. I had the hardest time getting myself to put the book down so I could go to sleep. It's about the original Tarot cards. Weird as Wonderland. Okay, maybe not that weird.

(I watched the Disney Alice and Wonderland with the girls I babysit today and it was WEIRD. I'd forgotten. And there's a hookah in a Disney movie! A symbol of Carroll's drug induced derraged mind while writing the book. Well, we didn't watch the whole thing. The girls --Olivia age 3 and Hannah age 6--got bored after the Cheshire Cat made his first appearance. Did I ever mention on here that I picked up a bi-weekly nannying job?)

Started a Writers Group

In Ann Arbor with Bethany Goad, Meg Leduc, and a girl named Becky Adams. We're going to try to meet every week. Looks like next time will be Saturday the 3rd at 1pm. We did a writing exercise and hopefully we'll be exchanging drafts, eventually. Anyone is welcome to join. :)

The Gospel According To Dale

On Tuesday I had a discussion with Dale about National Identity--does God promote it? I told Him that I had trouble with the OT stuff about God making an exclusive race to represent Him. He asked me why Jesus overturned the tables in the Temple Courts. I don't remember what I replied with. Something about marketing. His answer was that it was because that was the part of the Temple that was supposed to be dedicated to the Gentiles--where they could come in and learn about God and then, after conversion, be allowed into the more inner-parts of the temple. And the Jews were wasting this important part of the temple to sell things. In that way, they were being exclusive.

I've heard Dale speak of this before, but it reminded me that, from the beginning, God has never been exclusive. He separates us by letting us enter into His kindgom, but He has never closed the door. Jesus actually made that door wider in the way that He is even more accessable to gentiles. They don't have to trek all the way to Jerusalem to know about God anymore. Through Jesus, we are the temple and are brought to people face to face.

As a believer, I am separate but never exclusive.

Another cool point he made (and has made before) was with the question, "What was the sin of Sodom and Gomorrah?" He said almost everyone believes that God destroyed them because of homosexuality, but later on in the OT, God explains that they weren't taking care of their poor, their orphans, and their widows. It had nothing to do with sexual sin--at least, the sexual sin wasn't mentioned as a direct cause. Along the line with national identity, Dale reiterated the point that Israel came to ruin again and again when they forgot about their poor.

Mulling it over

I have had some interesting thoughts running through my head. Two phrases were pitched at me that I've been thinking about.

The first was an idea that Freedom is a man-made institution. That's how it was said to me but I interpret it as "freedom is a man-made idea." I replied that Freedom could not be man-made because it relies on a security that comes from an outside source that is not from men. Let me explain. Why is it that we are supposed to recieve freedom from salvation in Jesus? Why do we Jesus-heads walk around proclaiming that we know freedom (more than anyone else...)? I think it has to do with Jesus conquering death. If death isn't conquered we're a slave to it. We might have our lives under control (paid our insurance on this and that), found a way to be happy (creating and vacationing), and a way to have perfect relationships with people (loving them, finding a way to have humility in the presence of others, mastering forgiveness and refusing to judge), but even if we've done all that, there's still the bondage to death: we could die at any second from any number of causes (I'm not in a morbid enough mood to go through them but cars come to mind.) As long as death is at our door, we are not free. But in Jesus there's the idea of resurrection, that life will come through death and that, to me, is pure freedom. If death is taken care of, we are free to live. That is the security I'm talking about.

I am not talking about the security of tightening borders and building defense armies for national freedom. I see that as a kind of slavery. But I think that the same principle motivates those who move in that direction.

When we say, we as in believers, that we are free from this world, I think we are really saying that we are free from the death of this world.

Another idea that was put in my head is the phrase "Being Christ-like without Christ." At first when I heard this phrase, "Christ Like," I thought of the qualities of Jesus that the utterer of the words encompassed: forgiveness, humility, love for neighbors and friends, kindness, patience, openess. And in those things, I'd say they're doing a great job at being Christ-like. But then I had to ask myself for a definition of Christ-like, and that made me realize how, in my thinking, impossible it is to be Christ-like without Christ.

Christ, I'm pretty sure, is the same as Messiah. Messiah means from God, or annointed by Him. Sent from God. Maybe there is another way to define christ, if there is a christ with a lower-case "c," but I can't imagine it for my own life. Really, there is nothing more to being Christlike than being annointed by God. The rest, kindess, Patience, Corinthians 13, comes out of this annointance. Is that a word? Annointance? It is now. We can't be of God, from God, without God. That just doesn't make any sense.

I desire to be Christ-like. I think this is because I've seen something about Jesus that makes me want to emulate Him. I've "tasted" His Freedom, I've had my mind open up, if just a crack, to higher things that have convinced me that, as Bjork sings, "There's more to life than this." These are notions that are a bit separate to my desires to be "Good" in the Corinthians 13 sort of way. I DO think it's possible do be those things without Christ (Checking above my head for lightening...), but there is life beyond those things. Even with those things there is death. I mean, Ghandi was amazing and fantastic and inspirational, but Ghandi died. (Whether or not Ghandi will be resurrected, I have no capacity to know.) The life beyond good comes by revelation. I believe revelation comes by seeking it, and I think Jesus believes that, too.

*I must note that I live in admiration of the Ghandi-esque. I admire effort. I can't imagine that God doesn't admire this as well. I'd much rather surround myself by people who desire Good and don't know Jesus (yet) than people who believe and don't think about love much. I don't know many who follow under the latter, but hopefully you get what I'm saying.

a reminder to myself.

I'm coming to my blank blog document from a place of frustration. I guess I can use the blog this way, right? To rant, just once?

I find myself slipping into the feeling of insignificance again. For a while there I carried myself with purpose, but lately I'm starting to feel again that I have none. That I'm wasting my days away chasing after the ability to support myself. I've started making decisions based on how much money I'll make because I don't have enough money. I am not living very comfortably. I desire a life that allows me to create and be submersed in creative production, but I just cannot manage that right now. I don't have time for it. I work all day and I'm too tired to write. I made the decision today to not be involved in any productions for a while, probably not till March when Anne Frank comes around, because I'm not writing when I'm in a show. But I've lost confidense in my ability to write a piece, specifically fiction, because I haven't done it for so long. I cannot read what I've written and be satisfied, either.

On top of that I am trying to maintain a sort of social life that has grieved me lately me because I'm either at the bar with people who don't know that I love Jesus or if they do they aren't all that interested. Or I am at Bible Studies with people who are my parents' age. I have about three friends that would feel comfortable coming to the bar with me and going to a Bible Study, but beyond that, there is no middle ground and I feel kind of yanked in all directions. Feeling out of place most of the time doesn't really make for feeling like I am productive or feeling that I have significance.

If this blog entry were a Psalm, this is where it would say, "SELAH". Whatever the hell Selah means. Pause, or something. A pause for reflection.

Today I went to my uncle Tom's Bible study, where, yes Rachel, we are studying Revelation. I was very struck by the idea that in the moment before the end, Three Angels come and proclaim a last call to following Jesus. This is a promise that the truth I live by will be unavoidable. Completely clear. A huge part of that book is the idea that everyone will know. I see this as assurance for all of my doubts. There is so much that I don't know. But up to the last second, loud and clear, no longer just a "spiritual thing," I will see these things that I have mere inklings about now. But I am thankful for the inklings. Also, that up to the last minute, Jesus will be inviting people to live with Him. The fact that some of us live with him before this last call is really to our benefit. We should be thankful that we have relationships with Him already. One day, this relationship will be undeniable for me. I need to hear that because I find my mind slipping into denial, every once in a while.

The first angel tells the world that we were created. The idea that I have a creator is the first step to relief for me in this overwhelming feeling of insignificance. I was created with purpose. I have this purpose built in me right now. Not purpose like, "I am going to be a famous writer." But purpose that I will be with God. I will have a relationship with him. That I do have a relationship with him and one day will see, clear as an angel in mid-air (as chapter 14 describes), the fruits of that relationship.

I need to think about this purpose. It reminds me that my relationship with God manifests itself in my relationships with other people. I wrote a song with the line, "You got someone to love, you got a reason to live." I am once again reminded that all my days that are filled with the interraction with others are days with purpose, because every interraction, be it with the guy behind the counter at the gas station or my co-workers at JC Penneys, is an opportunity to love. There is enough of God's purpose to fill each day with significance, just because of that.

Jesus has told me about a billion times not to chase after things like food and clothes. But I have been doing that. I've also been chasing after ways to fulfill myself creatively. I think it's time for me to slow down and realize that if I chase after the Kingdom, chase after obedience to Jesus' will that we love one another the way I know He loves me, I will find that significance I seek. The rest, how I get my food and how I get to be creative, is just the product of this seeking process.

a tour of random thoughts

I don't think I update often enough to have faithful readers.

So, I'm back in the swing of things. Back and broke. I was explaining to one of my coworkers, Lisa Haynes, that there's nothing mexican in South Africa and she said "That's how we're going to make some money, Nora! Open up a Taco Bell!"

I negotiated more hours from my store manager--they were only giving me 16, now I should be able to get at least 20 or 25. I also negotiated, with my supervisor, time off for the campout. I could come for maybe Sunday through Thursday. The clincher is whether or not the store manager and the supervisor communicate well enough to see this contradiction... It's so hard to want money and to not want to work. I guess everyone can relate to that?

I went to a BBQ for Mr. Joel's B-day where his friend made this food--briskets and chicken-- in an enormous smoker he made from a fridge that he painted like a cow. The highlight was meeting Joel's sister and brother-in-law, who I like to call "bad-ass Christians," if that helps you understand what fun I had with them. It's nice to meet believers who are also dark and think. I guess, as they sing in Pete's Dragon, "There's room for everyone in this world," But I guess I would prefer to be in the part of the room where the bad-ass Christians are... you know, the Bonhoeffer ones as opposed to the ones who are left behind.

Tonight I'm going to see a band called teh Magnolia Electric Company and I'm excited because I'm not paying. The good thing about being broke is all the free stuff! The good thing about having money is to be able to provide the free stuff, and I prefer the latter position.

One more note. I THINK I AM PLAYING A CONCERT IN DETROIT NEXT SATURDAY NIGHT WITH BLAIR. Most of you readers will be camping out and I can come up there and play you anything you missed (except I cannot play you Blair, which will be the highlight.) SO, I'll update as soon as I know.

And one more "one more note." I am now dealing with the trauma of having my Sunday school kids insist on reading revelation. What's more, to learn that Haskell always skipped some parts in teaching it feeling that he was unequipped to interpret. So who am I, I wonder. But I don't want to deny them what they want to learn. I mean, I would be ticked to have people tell me "You shouldn't read that..." not ticked, compelled. Compelled to read. I also get annoyed when people answer my hard questions about the OT with "Just read the NT." Or "Why are you reading other people's mail?" type answers. I explained this to my father and mother today and my dad gave this Hilarious interpretation of the Old Testament for me. It went something like "In the Old Testament we learn that if we want to take over a nation we just pray and God anhilates (sp?) and then we can take anything He tells us we can take and if we take anything he tells us not to take he will annhilated US." I love his irreverence. Back to teaching kids Revelation (or as Espanolas call it, "Apocolyptica" or something like that.) Any thoughts, 666?

Poems

Meg Leduc and I exchange poems over email. Here's one I sent from the big SA. I read it at a poetry reading at the Tatham Art museum and also at the Walk and Squawk jam session at the end of their show's run.


RELATING TO OMRI
Today we walked the dusty trails of a
South African Nature Reserve.
We snapped the Khaki Bos heads
From branches and smoothed them
Between our fingertips. We raised
The tiny yellow specks beneath
Our noses and inhaled the Nsangunsan Gu
Scent of citris and pine:The smell of Africa.

Omri Nene wears a t-shirt that bears
The naked breasts of an African woman:
She arches her back and shows off
Her perfect nipples. She will sit
Like that until someone tells her
For Jesus' Sake, put on a shirt.
She will raise an eyebrow.
She may or may not obey.
It's not like the Almighty God
Doesn't know what's beneath
The fabric, anyway.

That same modesty evangelist told
My South African friend that his people were
Cursed by Noah's other sons:
Their Ancient Father, Ham,
Lost his white when he was forced to walk
Down the dark continent; His skin was burned
Brown on the way. Their pales soles
Stand as proof.

Omri Nene has a sugarcane scar
Over his right eye from when
He was beaten with the actual cane
For tresspassing and stealing
The sweet ropes from farms.
The farmer chased him and his teachers
Forced him to explain the gash,
Through ashamed tears, to the other children.

I, too, have a gash-scar by my right eye
From when I fell off a swingset
And the doctor pulled the stitch too tight.
Omri asked if we grow sugarcane in Detroit.
I can't imagine showing off my nipples while
Sucking on sugarcane. No matter how
Many whiffs of Africa I take.

In this wintery-June
I wear sunscreen and a sweater.
I dodge cars coming at me
From the wrong side of the road.
The wrong side. I am upside down.
It's not like the Almighty God doesn't know
What's beneath my sweater, or beneath
My sunscreen, or beneath
My skin, or beneath
My flesh, anyway.

Open Mic

Hey people who read my blog. It's about 5:18pm, and as of now it looks like I will be playing an open mic at Xhedos cafe in Ferndale tonight. It starts at 8pm. My friend Blair is hosting... I have to call at 6:30 to see if I'll get a slot. Blair invited me to open for him at a concert later on in August. I'll keep you posted on that. It's crazy to think I might try to dive into this stuff.
If you get this in time, you can call me 313-310-2760 and i'll give you details about tonight.

and... she's back

Hey kids. I've returned home from South Africa. I caught some kind of something on the plane. A sickness kind of something. South Africans would call it the flu though we'd call it a cold. I bet you want an update. Well, I don't feel like making an update so I'll make a list.

Contrary to what Joel told me he knew about South Africa:

1) nothing bad happens there
2) it's always warm
3) it's always nice
4) it's entirely populated by homosexuals...

I did learn some things...

THINGS I LEARNED IN SOUTH AFRICA
1)Ketchup is tomato paste
2)There are burgers for men
3)Looking at extreme poverty can give one nightmares
4)You can get chutney flavored Lays chips
5)They eat candy in the shape of babies
6)Americans are unimpressive
7)Blankets are rugs
8)Mandela and MBheki (the current prez) are both Xhosa
9)In the winter it gets dark at 5pm
10)Combi buses (that's the public transportation) won't leave until they are full
11)Crepes are pancakes and pancakes are crumpets
12)The american dollar goes a long way, esp with food.
13)Everyone lives behind a locked fence
14)Alan Paton read the JB Phillips translation
15)Culture shock can make one not want to socialize

That's all I can think of now. For pictures from the trip, see norajeanpictures.blogspot.com

lifting stuff and moving stuff around

Hello people. I'm so tired I barely know what's going on. I'll give you a little update though.

I moved out this week. I now live with Erinn on Six and the big GR. The place is cool and it's nice to have to buy groceries. Yes, you heard that: It's nice to buy groceries. I forgot how much I love grocery shopping. It's empowering and fun and rewarding to see my old time favorites in the fridge--such as string cheese and vanilla creamer. So... I'm almost done moving in, though most of my books and all ove my DVDs and my bookshelf are at my parents' still. I beat the heat by a day, so I'm happy about that. I now live in Old Redford--interesting because I just wrote a song about it--Old Redford, that is.

I've also been moving stuff around at JCP. I've gotten lots of hours there lately because of inventory. If you've ever worked in retail, you must know what a pain inventory is. It happens once a year and they have to count everything in the store. So my job has been to go through every item and make sure it has a price tag to scan. Argh. I decided it was bad, but not as bad as Christmas. Nothing is as bad as Christmas in retail.

Finally, I've been moving stuff at the Jewish Ensemble Theater--today's the last day of props. Two of the prop crew--Annie and Joe, are in tech for a show at the Blackbird theater in Ypsi, so I've had to do every show this week (usually I've had 2 days, this week, five). The last show is tonight, after which I plan to go home and go to bed as early as possible, and because I don't have to work tomorrow, sleep in as late as possible.

Sorry the update was so boring. I think I'm generally more interesting when I'm awake.

ee

Joel Mitchell writes me letters and, upon my request, sends me an ee cummings poem in each of them. This time he sent one to me over email. I thought it was good enough to post:

i am a little church(no great cathedral)
far from the splendor and squalor of hurrying cities
-i do not worry if briefer days grow briefest,
i am not sorry when sun and rain make april

my life is the life of the reaper and the sower;
my prayers are prayers of earth's own clumsily striving
(finding and losing and laughing and crying)children
whose any sadness or joy is my grief or my gladness

around me surges a miracle of unceasing
birth and glory and death and resurrection:
over my sleeping self float flaming symbols
of hope,and i wake to a perfect patience of mountains

i am a little church(far from the frantic
world with its rapture and anguish)at peace with nature
-i do not worry if longer nights grow longest;
i am not sorry when silence becomes singing

winter by spring,i lift my diminutive spire to
merciful Him Whose only now is forever:
standing erect in the deathless truth of His presence
(welcoming humbly His light and proudly His darkness)

I have yet to read something of his I don't like.

Priorities

While I put away merchandise (aka, STUFF) at my job I sometimes have conversations in my head with, yes God, but also Mr. Selles, the store manager. I imagine these. Who knows if I imagine the God ones. Anyway, today I imagined Mr. Selles pointing out that my socks were mismatched. And then I realized that matching my socks is my second to last priority, watching television being my last. And then I made a priority list for myself:

1st: Loving God
2nd: Loving people (like the first... hahaha)
3rd: The campout
4th: Feeding my addictions (caffeine, nicotine, sugar)
5th: Creating (writing, acting, you know, art)
6th: Travelling
7th: Laughing/Conversation (they tie or are intertwined. you pick)
8th: Work/Income (JC Penney's/JET Backstage)
9th: Dale's Tuesday Night Bible Study
10th: Listening to music
11th: Writing Letters
12th: Thinking about politics
13th: Reading/Watching movies or plays
14th: Eating
15th: Calling people back
16th: Emailing people back
17th: My clothes
18th: Showers
19th: Matching my socks
20th: Watching Television

That was fun. try it. Explot the mistakes in mine, if you want...

Seven drinks away?

Your Brain is 20.00% Female, 80.00% Male

You've got the brain of a manly man Feelings, schmeelings... tears aren't for you. You could break both legs and not get misty eyed. A great problem solver, nothing ever phases you.

What Gender Is Your Brain?

All right, Annie. Your turn.

Best Thing I heard all week

Brian Moroski, the guy who put together Big Doings last year, used to have smaller doings called "Out of the comfort zone." On the invitation/flyers he sent in the mail, he put an Elvis stamp on them. Underneath the stamp he wrote: Ezekiel 30:13.
Those who took the time to look it up got to read:

Ezekiel 30:13:
This is what the Sovereign Lord says, "I will destroy the idols and put an end to the images in Memphis."

Best Thing I heard all week

Listening to Tom

Tom Waits has hovered around me for many years and I just recently dove in to his many CDs we have around the house. This is thanks to Mr. Dale Batten who dedicated about an hour after his irreverent Bible Study, Tuesday night, to getting Meg, Lisa, and me hooked on Tom Waits' music. I left his house wondering what on earth Tom was getting at when he wrote the lyrics:

hen the weather gets rough
and it's whiskey in the shade
Ii's best to wrap your savior
up in cellophane
He flows like the big muddy
but that's ok
Pour him over ice cream
for a nice parfait

In his Chocolate Jesus song. I knew I loved it, but I didn't know why. Lisa and I talked about what we thought the song meant, and it turned out that we were pretty much right--we said it's a comment on how "accessable" people make Jesus for themselves. That line pretty much depicts that. I think it's pretty amazing.

After Dale's, I've been listening to his CDs incessently. I decided today at JC Penney that you can pretty much gauge that a soul is good if the person listens to Tom Waits.

Much of his content is poetry with some kind of jazz in the background. It's great poetry. I think you can pretty much gauge that a soul is good if the person reads poetry.

Hello Kids. and update for you.

I've been avoiding the blog. Can't say why. I'm at the JET (Jewish Ensemble Theater) where I now work as prop crew. They're doing Brighton Beach Memoirs. My friend Ms. Annie Palmer got me the job because she could only do half of the shows. It's nice to be a part of another show--continue on with my role in the theater community. This one will last me until the week before I leave for South Africa.

So, I'm going to South Africa on June 19th. I'll come back July 19th. I'm pretty excited, as you can imagine. I've been told that my eyes twinkle at the idea of travelling. We'll see how I feel after 2 days on a plane. But the good news is that lisa bought me a digital camera so I can take pictures and post 'em. Hurray Hurray. It's good to have good friends.

Other news: teaching sunday school was a blast today. Mainly because I make the kids draw pictures after the teaching and they have to explain them. These kids are, oh, 15. And they are a trip! Knowing they have to draw increases their focus, I've noticed. I like teaching in general.

still other news: I'm moving out with Erinn soon. Maybe at the end of this month. HUrray! I can have company again, without getting grimmed by my parents.

Lyrics

I wrote a song! I rather like it. Here's the lyrics:

Feeling First (based on an ee cummings poem)

"I think that in a past life I must have been a pirate
They tried to teach me about my life from books
And I set out for the sea
Now I'm just a little girl who's read of many places
And bored as hell from living in a Detroit Library.

Chorus:
Good Lord get me out of here,
Sweet Jesus rescue me
And save me from the doldrums of a one-place-destiny.
I've been itching for the road just as long as I have known
That kisses are a better fate than wisdom.

Teach me how to breath by breathing on a mountain top
Teach me how to walk by walking on an old dusty road
Teach me how to love by strolling under nightlife city streetlights
Teach me how to find my balance sailing on a weathered sailboat.

Chorus

Fill my life with faces of friends and enemies
By loving them I'll learn to love you more
Teach me about sorrow from dining with the rich
Teach me about joy from laughing with the poor

Chorus

Teach me to forgive from forgiving
Teach me how to love from loving
Teach me how to give from giving
Teach me how to live from living

I stand before you Jesus as an open book
My empty pages waiting for your pen
'Cause no one tells a story like a Living Word
So kiss me Lord, and let my life begin"


And Chuck Wilkinson said it sounded like Woody Guthrie! Ta DA! Take that fascists! Hahaha.

NOW

Okay, sorry people. I have news.

Last week, Monday, the mailman traded the check I had for my summer trip to South Africa for a rejection letter from the Fulbright people. So, I didn't get it. I'm taking the trip to South Africa anyway. Who the hell would pass that up?

The good news is, I've been happy!

Don't ask me about my plans. I don't have them and I am damned proud of it. I decided to stop living in the future. I hope she won't get mad at me when I write this next bit, but something Lisa prompted me to say must be documented. On Sunday we went to see my friend Dan Kahn play at a crowded brewery in Detroit... I was standing on a chair so I could see (it was that crowded). Lisa was explaining to someone (was it me?) that her life begins in August, after the campout. She means that the new path she's on, her teaching internship and masters degree, starts then. But when I heard "My life begins in August," I stomped on the chair and yelled, "My life begins NOW!"

I like that.

Don't worry, the place was loud and hardly anyone turned and looked.

I've been happy. I got another job, running props at the JET's new show, "Brighton Beach Memoirs." For someone who has quit theater, I do an awful lot of it. I really haven't stopped since February. So now I'm in rehearsal for that. I'm splitting the job with my friend Annie that I met in Anne Frank (she played Charlie in Manny). I'm very grateful for her helping me to get that job because I need money. I've also been getting about 30 hours at JCP, so I'm making much more money for May and June than I had expected. I should be set for my trip and just about ready to move out by the post-campout period.

Move out where? I'm not going to answer that! I live in now, now. (Detroit, Wayne State area, as of NOW... :P). I have been putting away JCP stuff and dreaming about having my own little tiny place that I can pull out my guitar, my computer, or my monologues and not have to deal with anyone listening. I want to live alone so bad. And it's so practical! But we'll see what opens up. For all I know I might fall in love with South Africa during my three weeks there and move there.

The Lord is taking good care of me, putting good people in my life. I left Manny in the Mirror knowing that I've never worked with such love amongst a cast before. Theater has brought me piles of friends around here... so that's why I want to stick around. And I get to do theater here. I like the idea that I'm using my degree. But it's the people, mostly.

The night I found out the disappointing news, I called Joel and he read me poetry to make me laugh. I think the first time I laughed all night was when he read the first poem, which goes:

Don't be angry
I'm in bed thinking
Of you at work.

(That's the whole poem.)

Today I recited that for the ladies at JC Penney's and they ate it up. The breakroom shook with laughter. It was the perfect place to share those perfect three lines. But anyway, I'm greatful for Joel for being for me then. I have what I need when I need it. And if you don't know Joel Mitchell, you should.

I've been living in poetry. Writing songs, writing poems, reading poems. I've fallen in love with words again. I think writing puts me in "now" more than anything. It's much easier to write when I'm just enjoying what's around me. And I have been! I've been more self-entertained than ever. I've enjoyed entire days, even those in retail, because I've been noticing things more and laughing more.

The Lord has been very good to me, as they say. I'm starting my day reading Matthew and then I find that I'm thinking about Jesus all day, the things he's done in that book. For example, I read today about when Jesus asks Peter to drop his fishing career and follow Him. As a result, Peter would be surrounded by people to love, as a "fisher of men" (people laugh at that verse, I do all the time, but I'm seeing what it means now, more than ever.) I've decided to follow Jesus instead of leaning on my own understanding. I've been trusting Him and dumping the idea of planning out my future. As a result, my life has been filled with people to love. And that's what being a fisher of men is--loving one another, as Jesus loves us. I've been crazy about Jesus and know it's no coincidence that I'm crazy about people too. And it's no coincidence that in being in love with Jesus and people, I've been in love with life.

Life is good. That ain't no lie.

Manny Info

Sorry I made you all miss the first weekend.

WHAT: Manny and the Mirror, a Rock Opera
WHEN: The last two weekends in April, Thursday, Friday and Saturday.
HOW MUCH: Thurs and Fri--$10. Saturday--$15
WHERE: The Planet Ant Theater.

Get off of 75 at the Holbrook/Caniff exit. If you're coming from 75 North (coming from the South... Confusing!), drive along the Chrysler service drive for a bit and turn Right on Caniff. If you're coming from 75 South, that is, coming from the Northward direction, turn Left on Caniff almost immediately after you exit.
Once you're on Caniff. Drive straight until you see a purple building with an ant painted in the side. It's on your left. There will be the Hamtramk library on your right. You'll see the Ant. It's purple. Park for free on the street or in the library lot.

WHO: I'm playing a siren/13 year old church girl. They are not two characters, they are the same person, I'm pretty sure. Don't come to gain insight and understanding in the storyline. Rather, come to ROCK OUT!

MORE INFO: planetant.com

A Damned Good Day.

Today was so perfect that I think I should go to bed before something bad happens.

I woke up at Lisa's and had breakfast for the first time in a long time, it seems. My first obligation was to help Blair with the poetry workshop at Hannan House. The people there were a trip up the old staircase (as I like to say). We wrote letter poems to our feet! Every poem was quite different, as you would imagine. Most of the poems were asking the feet why they don't cooperate. I wrote one asking my feet not to cooperate with my mind--to get me out of bed in the morning so I wouldn't lie there thinking about things I can't help. Confused? Maybe it was one of those "You had to be there"s.

Then I had three hours to kill before rehearsal, also by Wayne State (in a Woodbridge Apartment). So first I walked to Barnes and Noble and bought Hedwig and the Angry Inch (I want to put a song from there on a "Roadtrip Reflection" CD Lisa and I are vainly putting together... It has songs that to us resemble our experiences at each stop. I would tell you which Hedwig song, and which location, but it's the only choice I feel guilty about!). Nate's old boss, Reggie, helped me find the CD. I really love Reggie (I've talked to him twice), and it was worth the walk down there.

Then I went to the Meetery Eatery Coffee House on Woodward and worked on a short story for about an hour and a half. My friend Joel from Anne Frank exposed me to this place. It's very cute and maybe classy. They play really good background music--India Arie type stuff, jazzy black women voices and hip hop beats... Joel and I went there one day to see a poetry reading. After waiting an hour and a half and no poetry, we scadaddled over to the DFT to see ten minutes of a foreign film (We didn't pay because we have friends in high places). That was about a month ago or something... Today, after writing, I also studied a script that the kids at Maple (School with classes for Homeschoolers) are performing. I'm going to kind of take over the Robin Hood play that the 5-10 year olds are performing. Five year olds on stage? With Lines? You betcha... My first goal is to get them to slow the hell down. They all talk too quietly and too fast. But man are they cute. Anyway, so I prepared for this at the Meetery Eatery. And then I ran into Bethany Patterson (Who, by the way, is in my phone as BAD... This is because that's what appeared on my phone's screen when I typed her name in. I love it when she calls because BAD shows up. Ask me what you're in my phone as.)

Then I had rehearsal for Manny and the Mirror. We had our first run through and I decided that I really like a lot of the music in our little rock opera. Come see it! I'll make a post with performance details... Some day... When I have them. I learned today that Joel calls the show "Immanuel and his Looking Glass." He's not working on the show this year (they've put it one before, three times or something...), and Joel AD'd (I think?) previous productions. Anyway, hearing that he called it that made me miss him a lot.

Anyone want to go to a Tiger's game Saturday afternoon? Let me know! The more the merrier...

Happy Birthday Ian

My brother turns twenty-seven today. He's in Lansing this weekend working at their film festival, and then he returns to Chicago. Last Sunday I spent a lot of time with him--he came to the Walking Project walk in Detroit with me and then we drove out to my Aunt Judy's for Easter dinner. Those who know me know how much I love my brother...

I haven't lived with him for over nine years. It's very easy to love someone who you don't live with. Do you ever notice that? Not to say that if I lived with him I wouldn't love him, but I probably wouldn't be as aware of it. Funny how that is.

Today was a "Listen to The Bends" kind of day: heavy, dark, chilling, and eventually cynical.

Once I was having a free-style writing session (we called it a "writing party") with Bethany Goad and Rebecca Ridenour and Bethany wrote something about how she felt when she listened to Radiohead that went something like this:

"I am the coolest girl alive because I'm listening to cool music. People pass me byon the way to class and look at me and they have no idea how cool I am..."

That recount of her words didn't capture the slightest hint of how hilarious a thing she really wrote... Good Lord do I miss her... But I was so amused by how she recorded Radiohead to make her feel when she listened to it. When I listen to them I feel like I'm listening to my tribe's background music--like I've touched some kind of dark reality. I feel relieved (in a way) that I can channel my cynicism through my ears. And yet, I guess I have to agree with "Bose" that I, too, feel pretty cool when I listen to them.

Photo of a Fiery Furnace

Today I read the story in Daniel (3) about Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego getting thrown into the fiery furnace and it struck me as a pretty damn good reason not to fear anything. I actually got comfort in the idea of fearing the Lord... it became clear to me that there really is no reason to fear anyone else because He is so much greater. It's much better to obey Him and come out of this world unscorched than to disobey Him out of fear for the world.

It really is a powerful story--King Neb turns the furnace up 7x the regular heat--the beast was so hot that it killed the guards that threw the guys in just because they were standing close enough. I couldn't help but think, "Wow, this world does get pretty viscious..." But the three Jew-migos didn't even have the smell of fire on them when the "man who looked like the son of the gods" walked them out of that thing. What a great picture.

It's a picture of Hell, really. Stand too close and you're a goner. But even the threat of that instant death is no separation from the Deliverance of Jesus.

Maybe I can get over my allergy to the Old Testament if I look at it more as a photo album of what God does and what His power looks like... Of what Jesus looks like. It's full of great pictures of these things. Some of the pictures, though, I'll admit--I just don't understand. Yet. I don't understand them yet.

Some Forceful Thoughts (Watch Out...)

Last night at Dale Batten's Bible Study in Harrison Twp., I had this revelation:

The road to heaven isn't paved with good intentions, it's paved with relationships. If God opens doors and closes them, it's for the sake of relationships. I believe that if we allow Him to, God molds us into our white-stone self--IE, we are molded as creatures who reach their greatest potential. We're made in the image of God, so that is a pretty high potential. Meanwhile, the events in our life following Him resemble some intricate dance of interractions with people, or, as I say, relationships with people.

So why are Christians so exclusive? So divided? I believe the number one person excluded from the Church (in America?) is the "homosexual." A person should always feel comfortable in a Fellowship group, no matter what they identify themself as (or what society identifies them as...). If Jesus is truly at the gathering place of Believers, the homosexual person should be drawn there. How does the world know Jesus is in us? By the way we treat each other. That's what John says over and over in his letters. I have heard quite a bit of gay-bashing in my life, and it's always from the mouth of Christians. This infuriates me, because why are we focusing on one aspect of a person and then ripping it apart? Now if a person insists that a certain aspect of themselves be emphasized, that's one thing that we can't help, but I don't believe we should ever rip apart a person because of a choice they make. Who do we think we are, really? I think we are trying to be Judges. Well, we need to quit that because it really pisses Jesus off.

The book I'm reading is about politics and God--my two favorite subjects, the two most apalling subjects to bring up in public (though my circles dismiss the first and welcome the second subject into their conversations, it seems. Probably rightly so, but it IS nice to find a friend I can discuss both subjects with freely). The author, whose name is Jim Wallace, quoted some NY Preacher who said "Nobody gets into Heaven without a letter of recommendation from the poor." What do you all think of that? I think it's a fantastic image, really. I'm weighing that idea with the fact that there's a book sold in a Christian catalogue called "The Wall-Mart Way" that offers instructions on the Christ-like way to be a Wall-mart-like entreprenuer. (I have no idea how to spell entreprenuer. I don't really care, either, because I don't care to be associated with that word.)

I think the word poor can have a multitude of meanings. We need to love the poor and rich alike to keep on God's path. Eric Bibb puts it best:

"Walk with the rich
Walk with the poor
Learn from everyone
Thats what life is for..."

Isn't that what life is for? How can we learn unless we love? I have said this many times, I think. But it's ringing truer for me every day. And you know? I think one of the best things about being single is that it frees me up to love people on an equal plain... I don't have to pay more attention to one in particular. I will enjoy this while it lasts.

Today a ghost is born

"I'm going away
Where you will look for me
Where I'm going you cannot come
No one's ever gonna take my life from me
I lay it down
A ghost is born"

~Wilco, THEOLOGIANS

That's my song I "discovered" this week. And it's an Easter message! Today the ghost was born. I love ghosts, as many of you know, so that was a cool way to see Easter.

This year has been a big year for me, in terms of resurrection. I thought about resurrection and celebrated it all year long. Around this time last year I sort of discovered the law of resurrection--how life comes from death. It's been at the points when I have felt that I had nothing that life came pouring in. I have discovered that through the resurrection: the best art comes from suffering, the funniest comedy comes from sorrow, the truest friendships are the ones that were held through hardships. So you see, the resurrection law affects everyone.

And now we get to see it! Spring is the resurrection season--we get to see the dead rise all around us. In summer we'll forget how it snowed all through our March.

Happy resurrection day, everyone.

Quiz results

Here's the results from some quizzes I got the link from Ann Scharnhorst's blog. The first was to see what country I am. Of the 60 something possiblities of Nations that most resemble Nora Jean Bonner, I got:

You're
the United Nations!

Most people think you're ineffective, but you are trying to
completely save the world from itself, so there's always going to be a long
way to go.  You're always the one trying to get friends to talk to each
other, enemies to talk to each other, anyone who can to just talk instead of
beating each other about the head and torso.  Sometimes it works and sometimes
it doesn't, and you get very schizophrenic as a result.  But your heart
is in the right place, and sometimes also in New York.
face="Times New Roman">Take the Country
Quiz at the Blue Pyramid

So... That's why I'm so damn patriotic these days!

Next, the State Quiz:
p>


You're Missouri!

An admirer of the works of Mark Twain and the steamboat lifestyle, you
are happiest when floating gently down the river. You have a strong sense of
independence, a reverence for saints, and even look up to discredited explorers. With all
these traditional influences, it's no surprise you're at the center of everyone you know,
and are even considered a gateway to the future. If only you could stop drinking the
world's worst beer, you'd be set.


Take the State Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

I drink Rolling Rock. I guess that's not really quality. The Mark Twain part is right.

Finally, the book quiz:
p>


You're The Poisonwood Bible!

by Barbara Kingsolver

Deeply rooted in a religious background, you have since become both
isolated and schizophrenic. You were naively sure that your actions would help people,
but of course they were resistant to your message and ultimately disaster ensued. Since
you can see so many sides of the same issue, you are both wise beyond your years and
tied to worthless perspectives. If you were a type of waffle, it would be
Belgian.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

All I have to say about that is HAH. I think that one was the most right on, was it not? Too bad I can't get through that book...

I guess I should post the link to these quizzes:
http://bluepyramid.org/ia/

Let me know how you do...

Annex Part III

Today we had our most rowdy audience yet. I almost broke out of character during the Anne-Kisses-Peter scene, because each of their movements was interpreted vocally:

1) The bell tolls 9 o'Clock, and Anne is supposed to be out of the attic (where she is on her "date" with Peter)--the audience groans.
2) Anne moves past Peter and he doesn't kiss her--The audience groans louder.
3)Peter gives Anne a peck on the cheek--The audience groans even louder.
4) Anne gives Peter a huge smackeroo--The audience cheers.

Meanwhile, I'm looking at my crossword puzzle book, trying desperately not to laugh, or to discreetly glance at Seth the Stagehand who sits directly across from me, stage right (which would cause me to laugh more).

I'm noticing that it's getting a bit harder to focus during performances. Maybe I just need a break. Well, I have tomorrow off, a performance Sunday, Monday off, and then performances Tuesday through Friday. It's amazing how fast this process went by...

And Another One

I have another performance project underway--I'm in an original rock musical called Manny in the Mirror. The person who wrote it is in Anne Frank with me (he plays Krahler, for those who know the show). We're performing at the Planet Ant theater in Hamtramk. Performances are mid April through Mid May. I play some kind of Siren--who is also a 13 year old church girl or something. More information will be posted when I know what it is I'm doing...

Annex Update P. 2

Today's show went terribly. I dropped lines a couple times, and I don't have that many lines to begin with... Roger and Mark from my neighborhood theater came and saw me today too, which was very sweet of them but I wish I'd given them a better performance. I think I was jinxed... I made a sarcastic remark before the show about how I was going to refuse to take anymore notes because my performance was perfect. I was joking! But I just couldn't get into it today.

We only had one school come but there was a talk-back. The two teachers that were there asked 99% of the questions. That was a bit annoying. I think those kids just wanted to leave. I was too miserable to answer any of the questions, because I felt so lousy about my performance. I wished I could have answered the question about "should someone who wants to be an actor study theater in college?" I would have appalled them with the answer "Not all actors should go to school. School isn't for everyone." But I couldn't say that because Mr. Van Daan already had put in his 10 cents about why school is necessary. There was also the question, what should someone DO if they want to be an actor? What was our advice? I said nothing, but here is my advice: Get your self-worth from a source outside of theater. Know that theater will never love you as much as you love theater. I wonder what the 12-14 year olds would have thought of that. I guess it's good I didn't answer the question. I mean, who wants to listen to a bitter (old) actress?

Secrets of the Annex (P. 1?)

We opened the show today. I'm in the Diary of Anne Frank for those who forgot, playing Anne's sister Margot. The crowd was kids, rowdy ones at that.

When the show opens, I'm the first person you see as the curtain rises--they sent Margot before the other Franks because she was called up by the Nazis (that's why the family went into hiding). I could hear the rumbling of youngsters on the other side of the curtain before it rose. They were pretty rowdy during the whole show, very vocally responsive during the scene where Anne and Peter kiss. I guess I didn't mind it too much be cause I liked to hear them express their reactions. Why do we have theater, anyway? So we can supress reactions? I found comfort in their hoots,really I did. "They are there,"I thought while sitting on the couch and pretending not to hear them while the scene was going on behind me. "They are there and they are alive."

I should say that at the end of the play they were completely silent. That said something too... In fact, if they weren't so rowdy for the rest, we wouldn't have seen the impact of the last scene.

Here's the funny story of the performance: The person that brings us things in the play, Miep, comes in and tells us about the British Invasion of Europe. SHe puts a map on the table and all the kids (anne, peter, and me) look over her shoulder at it. Today she couldn't find the map, so instead, she brought out a poster that had this huge picture of a puppet on it, a clown puppet. The girl who plays Anne, Sara, and I started cracking up. We just let the laughter out. It seemed appropriate to let the Frank gals get a good laugh in before the show was over. It was supposed to be a joyous occasion any how...

As a result of the missing map, we got this new piece of dialogue:
MIEP: Look! I brought a map!
ANNE: (Dead Pan): Yes, you sure did.

Well, that was the first performance. Maybe I'll have something to document from each one. Or at least a few more...

Security

I went to see the Soweto Gospel Choir last night. I am ready to go to South Africa now! They performed the most wonderful rendition of "Amazing Grace" I've ever heard. Funny how I can hear a song about a billion times and then on the billion and first time, it makes me cry. I cried at this line:

"The Lord has promised good to me
His word my hope secures
He will my shield and portion be
As long as life endures."

It's so good to have the Lord to trust. It's so good.