"When you're young, you think everything you do is disposable. You move from now to know, crumpling time up in your hands, tossing things, and people too--leave them behind. You don't know yet the habit they have, of coming back.
...
Time in dreams is frozen. You can never get away from where you've been.
~Margaret Atwood, THE BLIND ASSASSIN
I've been having such dreams, meeting people I have tried to forget. I don't cry about them any more, in real time. Just in my dream's time. Is it possible that Christians make mistakes that they can never escape? Jesus shows us a new world, but do we ever get out of the old one? My life isn't over. Some how, I must believe, he reforms the old into something useful.
Though it hurts to remember, I must be persistant in prayer, in praying for those who I want to forget. If I am reminded of them, I can remember to pray.
" Smiles and laughter and pleasant times
There's love in the world but it's hard to find
I'm so glad I found you -- I'd just like to extend
An invitation to the festival of friends.
Some of us live and some of us die
Someday God's going to tell us why
Open your heart and grow with what life sends
That's your ticket to the festival of friends.
Like an imitation of a good thing past
These days of darkness surely will not last
Jesus was here and he's coming again
To lead us to his festival of friends.
Black snake highway -- sheet metal ballet
It's just so much snow on a summer day
Whatever happens, it's not the end
We'll meet again at the festival of friends. "
Wednesday, June 16, 2004
Monday, June 14, 2004
A little update
I've been keeping pretty busy. This weekend started when Rebecca Ridenour, Nate Rivard and his sister Rose came out here on Friday night. Rose went to a concert for much of the evening. The Bible study we usually have was cancelled because Niki and Jenni were up north for one of their three wedding showers. Rebecca, Nate, and I went and grabbed Thai food before heading over to Top of the Park for a free concert. My friend Dan met us there and we hung out until Rose called because her concert was over. then we all went back to my apartment and Bekah Brown joined us there for a game of that hot-potato/taboo thing--what's it called? Catch Phrase. It was a highly enjoyable evening.
On Saturday I worked at the Pit. In the morning, before work, Rebecca and I had a nice visit. We had our own Bible study (studying proverbs) and then we went over to the Farmer's Market so she could find a present for a graduation party. The pit was dull and slow, but there was one funny occurance. Right before we closed, this man and his wife walked in and ordered tea and a vegetable boat and started to ask me about how business was. I gave them the usual shpeal about how business was slow b/c the students were gone, but not too bad because we had a nice review in the paper. "How would you like to be in the Freepress?" he asked.
"You work for the Freepress?"
"I'm just enjoying a nice evening out." At 11:45pm. At the Jerk Pit. Hm.
I told him that I wanted to be a writer, but he wouldn't talk to me about his obvious job as a writer. He also mentioned that he had visited 6 restaurants that evening, so it was pretty clear that he was reviewing us. I wonder if he thought we were psycho.
Yesterday I faced the day with a mere 2 hours of sleep the previous evening. I went to church and stayed attentive for Randy Baxter's teaching. Then I met Nate and his family at the Detroit Festival of the Arts downtown. I LOVE MY CITY. The festival was fabulous. We saw this Cuban Jazz band play and that was probably my favorite part. Nate and Rose got up and danced the little bit of Salsa they learned together, which was fun to watch. Then their little sister, Emilie, was a but bummed that she didn't get to dance with him so he went up there with her too. The crowd was pleased. So, the group I was with at that point was Anne Rivard, Nate, Emilie, Rose, Greyson Buckingham, and Rebecca R. who came out with me. At about 4 the Rivards and Greyson left for a graduation party, and Rebecca and I ran into Jay and Scott from the Psalters, who were there playing with this guy named Ken Butler, who specializes in hybrid instruments (making guitars out of shovels and violins out of umbrellas, etc.) We watched them play, and then we went over to see Hugh Masekelah (sp?), a political South African trumpeter who was exiled during the Apartied.
After visiting with most of the Psalters band, I got to talking to this guy from Nigeria for a while and he gave me the scoop on South Africa. I've had a growing interest in apartied, so this was very cool for me. Then I went up closer to the stage and it started raining. This woman named Toni came up to me and shared her umbrella with me "Girl, you stand under here with me," she said. She was very sweet. Rebecca joined us later and we all started talking. Toni asked what my plans are (big surprise) and I told her about how I like to write about Detroit. She gave me some interesting resources and ideas for how to keep going with this collection of Detroit Essays I may or may not be working on. Anyway, talking to her was like a big kick in the ass to get cracking on my writing. I was really happy to talk to her. She was a believer, and kept encouraging me to keep going with my project and let the Spirit guide me. I miss this about the city. So many believers.
Rebecca and I decided to get going soon after we talked to Toni, and Nate called us to tell us to come over to his house in Royal Oak to watch the game, which we did. The Pistons won. Over all, it was a great day to be from the D.
At about 12:30am, I drove Rebecca to her car, still at the YWCA where my church meets. I was going to drive back to Ann Arbor, and I prayed before I left that God would protect me on the drive, I was soooo wiped out. And then I heard his voice say, "If you want to live to see tomorrow morning, I suggest you spend the night at your parents." 4 mins away instead of 35. So I did.
On Saturday I worked at the Pit. In the morning, before work, Rebecca and I had a nice visit. We had our own Bible study (studying proverbs) and then we went over to the Farmer's Market so she could find a present for a graduation party. The pit was dull and slow, but there was one funny occurance. Right before we closed, this man and his wife walked in and ordered tea and a vegetable boat and started to ask me about how business was. I gave them the usual shpeal about how business was slow b/c the students were gone, but not too bad because we had a nice review in the paper. "How would you like to be in the Freepress?" he asked.
"You work for the Freepress?"
"I'm just enjoying a nice evening out." At 11:45pm. At the Jerk Pit. Hm.
I told him that I wanted to be a writer, but he wouldn't talk to me about his obvious job as a writer. He also mentioned that he had visited 6 restaurants that evening, so it was pretty clear that he was reviewing us. I wonder if he thought we were psycho.
Yesterday I faced the day with a mere 2 hours of sleep the previous evening. I went to church and stayed attentive for Randy Baxter's teaching. Then I met Nate and his family at the Detroit Festival of the Arts downtown. I LOVE MY CITY. The festival was fabulous. We saw this Cuban Jazz band play and that was probably my favorite part. Nate and Rose got up and danced the little bit of Salsa they learned together, which was fun to watch. Then their little sister, Emilie, was a but bummed that she didn't get to dance with him so he went up there with her too. The crowd was pleased. So, the group I was with at that point was Anne Rivard, Nate, Emilie, Rose, Greyson Buckingham, and Rebecca R. who came out with me. At about 4 the Rivards and Greyson left for a graduation party, and Rebecca and I ran into Jay and Scott from the Psalters, who were there playing with this guy named Ken Butler, who specializes in hybrid instruments (making guitars out of shovels and violins out of umbrellas, etc.) We watched them play, and then we went over to see Hugh Masekelah (sp?), a political South African trumpeter who was exiled during the Apartied.
After visiting with most of the Psalters band, I got to talking to this guy from Nigeria for a while and he gave me the scoop on South Africa. I've had a growing interest in apartied, so this was very cool for me. Then I went up closer to the stage and it started raining. This woman named Toni came up to me and shared her umbrella with me "Girl, you stand under here with me," she said. She was very sweet. Rebecca joined us later and we all started talking. Toni asked what my plans are (big surprise) and I told her about how I like to write about Detroit. She gave me some interesting resources and ideas for how to keep going with this collection of Detroit Essays I may or may not be working on. Anyway, talking to her was like a big kick in the ass to get cracking on my writing. I was really happy to talk to her. She was a believer, and kept encouraging me to keep going with my project and let the Spirit guide me. I miss this about the city. So many believers.
Rebecca and I decided to get going soon after we talked to Toni, and Nate called us to tell us to come over to his house in Royal Oak to watch the game, which we did. The Pistons won. Over all, it was a great day to be from the D.
At about 12:30am, I drove Rebecca to her car, still at the YWCA where my church meets. I was going to drive back to Ann Arbor, and I prayed before I left that God would protect me on the drive, I was soooo wiped out. And then I heard his voice say, "If you want to live to see tomorrow morning, I suggest you spend the night at your parents." 4 mins away instead of 35. So I did.
